For You, Captain.

Hi D-----,

The right time will come when you will read this letter. Maybe when we are together (wishful thinking), or maybe when you randomly look for me on google and stumble upon this entry. There is a reason why I am not sending this letter to you. It's the last day of the year and I am pretty sure you wouldn't want to get this from me. Today should be all about your last day at work and plan what to do next with your career. That's
way more important than me now, and I totally understand that.

First of all, I want to say thank you all the good memories. You have been like my little piece of sunshine. You brought out the best of me and made me feel like I want to be a better person... I have not met someone who made me feel as comfortable with myself as with you. I appreciate you taking me to eat frogs, picking me up from Mandarin class and having dinner at the nearby hawker center, driving all the way to my place to help me with my stuff even if you were feeling sick, meeting my cousin in HK despite having a hangover to get my birthday gift, listening to my rants and work talks, watching Breaking Dawn with me, cooking me breakfast even if it tasted funky, giving me a Chanel perfume... Jeez there are more memories than this. I could not ask for anything more. We had a good set of memories. Thank you.

But I'm sorry... I don't know how to look after you at this tough stage in your life. I want to be there for you. This is what I want more than anything.... Yet I feel like I'm ruining every opportunity I have. I'm sorry for being selfish sometimes, that my happiness always comes first before you... I'm sorry for pressuring you too muchand for testing your feelings for me... I'm sorry for ever doubting you and for  not being patient enough to understand what you are going through. I hope I still have time to fix things between us, to make you feel the same way you have made me feel these past six months. I hope you are willing to do the same.

I think I love you already. I hope in the right time I can tell it to you personally. And I hope in the right time you will be able to figure out what you want in life, and that I will be part of your plans. Please don't forget me... I am willing to wait for you. I am just here. I will just be here to accept you with open arms. I love you and I will miss you a lot.

Angel