I have something to look forward to this May... Our BKK trip. Although it's for work, I'm pretty sure I'll learn a lot from this trip. My first time to have an Asian biz trip aside from North America. I guess I will start counting down the days....
But before that, I have Caliraya & Mt. Pinatubo to be excited for as well.
Yey, I love summer!
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Friends???
I spoke too early. He's proposing that we fix things again... as friends. Honestly, I don't know how to approach the whole situation. It's either I go for it or just avoid him again forever. I'm not sure if I should listen to my mind of my heart. I will have to seriously contemplate on this.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
2nd Month.
It's been two months since the nerd and I have last spoken. Two months have passed since I received that damned "friendly" greeting card and informative cookbook (yes, it's very informative-- contains 200 recipes below 200 calories while the other one's about 1,000++ pages thick! LOL). Two months.... and counting.
I can't believe time has flown by THIS fast. A lot of things have changed. I went through a major work dilemma (still going through it), been to T-Town & CDO, joined my first run, made friends with a new officemate, continued running some more, lost some weight, partied like rockstars at friends' birthdays, attended a close friend's wedding in Tagaytay... It has been nothing but pure awesomeness for the past weekends of 2010.
But admittedly, there are still days when I miss him. :( Once in a while (especially when I chance upon watching EMO movies hehehe), I still remember our happy moments... But of course after those happy moments, the annoying moments follow. haha.
I don't know, I guess I just miss having a friend like him. He was one of those people whom I could talk to about anything under the sun. With his different cultural background, he would always give me a different perspective on things and issues. I also enjoyed giving advice and helping him out with his issues. I don't think I'll meet someone like him at home.
On the other hand, from these past two months of contemplating and living my life to the "fuller" (not fullest, I believe I have not reached my peak yet hehe), I realized how much I have learned from our failed relationship. The most important thing I have learned is never to give soooo much of yourself to someone else because you lose yourself in the process. I realized I was probably too clingy to the point where it became abnormal already. I figured that there's no such thing as "fate" and "soulmates". I became a lot less of a hopeless romantic... I'm not sure if this will be for the better or worse, but I realized as well how this whole experience has "traumatized" me to fall in love again.... I'm definitely not going to jump to a new relationship anytime soon... Heck, I am not even getting attracted to other men (so not me, by the way)!!
I actually attempted to communicate with him very recently but I did not get any reply. I am sure he has his own reasons. I'm no longer expecting him to reply back, he's probably moved on and is in a better disposition by now. I guess only time can tell what will happen. For now, I just need to accept and move on. I think I am almost there. I hope once I have totally gotten over him, we can still be friends. We have the same birthdays, after all (haha where's the connection?!?!).
I can't believe time has flown by THIS fast. A lot of things have changed. I went through a major work dilemma (still going through it), been to T-Town & CDO, joined my first run, made friends with a new officemate, continued running some more, lost some weight, partied like rockstars at friends' birthdays, attended a close friend's wedding in Tagaytay... It has been nothing but pure awesomeness for the past weekends of 2010.
But admittedly, there are still days when I miss him. :( Once in a while (especially when I chance upon watching EMO movies hehehe), I still remember our happy moments... But of course after those happy moments, the annoying moments follow. haha.
I don't know, I guess I just miss having a friend like him. He was one of those people whom I could talk to about anything under the sun. With his different cultural background, he would always give me a different perspective on things and issues. I also enjoyed giving advice and helping him out with his issues. I don't think I'll meet someone like him at home.
On the other hand, from these past two months of contemplating and living my life to the "fuller" (not fullest, I believe I have not reached my peak yet hehe), I realized how much I have learned from our failed relationship. The most important thing I have learned is never to give soooo much of yourself to someone else because you lose yourself in the process. I realized I was probably too clingy to the point where it became abnormal already. I figured that there's no such thing as "fate" and "soulmates". I became a lot less of a hopeless romantic... I'm not sure if this will be for the better or worse, but I realized as well how this whole experience has "traumatized" me to fall in love again.... I'm definitely not going to jump to a new relationship anytime soon... Heck, I am not even getting attracted to other men (so not me, by the way)!!
I actually attempted to communicate with him very recently but I did not get any reply. I am sure he has his own reasons. I'm no longer expecting him to reply back, he's probably moved on and is in a better disposition by now. I guess only time can tell what will happen. For now, I just need to accept and move on. I think I am almost there. I hope once I have totally gotten over him, we can still be friends. We have the same birthdays, after all (haha where's the connection?!?!).
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Random Thoughts: 1/27/10
1. I stumbled upon the synopsis of the new movie, Dear John based on Nicolas Sparks' novel. Upon reading the novel it just made my heart melt more. Can't help but imagine that this could happen to me. And it more or less proves that long distance relationships are just too difficult to keep.
2. On a brighter note, I am looking forward to watching Valentine's Day. Aside from its star-studded cast, I am curious to know what will happen in this movie... Most likely to be very reminiscent of "He's Just Not that Into You" or "Love Actually". Now all I need is a movie date.
3. I am thinking if I have been too harsh with him on the whole situation... I don't know, it just makes me wonder what would happen if we have kept in touch until now.
4. I hate getting stressed and all paranoid. It blocks my problem solving skills. Now how do I prove myself if I'm in this kind of mess? FML.
5. Running is one of the best stress-relievers. I don't mind taking a run even if I'm super duper tired. Will make sure to do this at least once a week. So far, haven't missed a run!
6. I will try my best to eat breakfast everyday and wake up earlier so that I won't be late.
7. I need to get back on track, seriously.
8. I miss the feeling of having butterflies in my stomach. Right now I get nothing but pain in my stomach... Okay, that was an overstatement. :)
So help me, GOD.
2. On a brighter note, I am looking forward to watching Valentine's Day. Aside from its star-studded cast, I am curious to know what will happen in this movie... Most likely to be very reminiscent of "He's Just Not that Into You" or "Love Actually". Now all I need is a movie date.
3. I am thinking if I have been too harsh with him on the whole situation... I don't know, it just makes me wonder what would happen if we have kept in touch until now.
4. I hate getting stressed and all paranoid. It blocks my problem solving skills. Now how do I prove myself if I'm in this kind of mess? FML.
5. Running is one of the best stress-relievers. I don't mind taking a run even if I'm super duper tired. Will make sure to do this at least once a week. So far, haven't missed a run!
6. I will try my best to eat breakfast everyday and wake up earlier so that I won't be late.
7. I need to get back on track, seriously.
8. I miss the feeling of having butterflies in my stomach. Right now I get nothing but pain in my stomach... Okay, that was an overstatement. :)
So help me, GOD.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
One last time.
As much as I wanted to give US a chance, I need to face the reality that you are just not that into me. And what better way for you to show it than through your birthday greeting card and gift.
Don't get me wrong, I really appreciate the thoughtfulness of having to send a gift all the way to the Philippines. But c'mon, after what we have gone through together last year, you really had to show it bluntly on my face that we are just friends? I beg to differ, we are just not friends. For a time in our year 2009, we were even together. You reciprocated all the sweetness. YOU made me feel special. And obviously in my case you WERE just not a friend. And it hurts me so much that you had to really emphasize on the card that we are JUST friends. The cover card and the personal message. "You have been a great friend. TY" "When FRIENDS have birthdays..." Well, THANKS A LOT MISTER. A little more effort to show some deep gratitude please? I threw the card the very instant I laid my eyes on it.
I know I deserve a better man, and that is the very reason why I am blocking you out of my life now. I can never erase the fact that you have broken my heart. This will be all for the best.
Goodbye, D.
Don't get me wrong, I really appreciate the thoughtfulness of having to send a gift all the way to the Philippines. But c'mon, after what we have gone through together last year, you really had to show it bluntly on my face that we are just friends? I beg to differ, we are just not friends. For a time in our year 2009, we were even together. You reciprocated all the sweetness. YOU made me feel special. And obviously in my case you WERE just not a friend. And it hurts me so much that you had to really emphasize on the card that we are JUST friends. The cover card and the personal message. "You have been a great friend. TY" "When FRIENDS have birthdays..." Well, THANKS A LOT MISTER. A little more effort to show some deep gratitude please? I threw the card the very instant I laid my eyes on it.
I know I deserve a better man, and that is the very reason why I am blocking you out of my life now. I can never erase the fact that you have broken my heart. This will be all for the best.
Goodbye, D.
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