As the Year Ends...

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’ve never done before?
Eat Snake & Frog meat, Go Island Hopping. Tour New York City with Shara :)

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I kept some-- Traveling with friends & Improve Time Management -- but definitely making more next year.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My cousin Ria gave birth to Baby Zoey. She is my inaanak. :)

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Nope.

5. What countries did you visit?
US & HK

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
Focus, Independence, & a consistently Happy Heart.

7. What date from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
A lot -- but maybe it Good Friday this 2009 will still top the list.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Losing weight and spending for my own trips.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Hmm... Failing to make things work out for my happiness.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Food Poisoning, First day of December

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Buying an LX3 before the year ends. :)

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Shara's Return from NYC. And I deserved a birthday celebration this year.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
YOU KNOW WHO.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Clothes, Travels, & phone cards/celphone bill.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
My US TRIP (as usual it was extremely good AND bad),

16. What song/s will always remind you of 2009?
5 songs: Jay Z & Alicia Key's Empire State of Mind, BEP's I Got a Feeling, Taylor Swift's Love Story, Katy Perry's Thinking of You, and of course Lady GaGa's Poker Face.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
Happier or sadder? Depends on what aspect of life. :)
Richer or poorer? Richer (positive thinking!)

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Meet new people

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
CRYING and sulking. And HOPING.

20. How will you be spending / did you spend Christmas?
I spent it with my family and my cute pamangkins.

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?
Yes. Fell hard, now trying to get back on track.

22. How many one-night stands?
Ummm let me check how many to be exact haha.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
GLEE :)

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I don't really hate anyone naman.

25. What was the best book you read?
Yes Man!

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Lady Gaga & Katy Perry

27. What did you want and got?
An E63

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
Hands Down... (500) Days of Summer

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 24 last December 19 and had an AMAZING time with my friends.
Had a New Yorker theme and had 3 special guests - Shara Cardboards!

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
If only there was a chance to spend time with you-know-who. That way, I would
have realized things at an earlier time.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
More girly--- Lots of dresses and sleeveless tops, mini skirts and the
beachy feel =)

32. What kept you sane?
My friends and family.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Katy Perry. I adore her.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
MAGUINDANAO MASSACRE.

35. Who did you miss?
Shara & the Sex & the City girls. We rarely hung out this year. :(

36. Who was the best new person you met?
Best People: Angel de Rivera, Ryan Tan,

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.
Love yourself first before loving others.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
I'm Still Breathing -- Katy Perry

So as I write this letter
And shed my last tear
It's all for the better
That we end this year

Let's close this chapter
Say one last prayer
But don't say that you loved me

I'm still breathing
Though we've been dead for awhile
This sickness has no cure
We're going down for sure
Already been diagnosed
So let's give up the ghost

ABOUT TIME.

Last night, I FINALLY told myself that I've had enough of the nerd. It's no longer helping me. I cannot move on with him around. And I realized, after all the pain he has given me, I never really made him feel how mad and pissed I have been with how he has treated me. I always give in and forgive him for all his mistakes. It was too easy for him to win me back... After not talking to me for a month and coming back to my world just like that (back in May).. After taking my emails for granted and making me wait ALL THE TIME... After breaking my heart and telling me "it's all for the good" (maybe it's more for HIS good)... There are still so much more that I can write here but I choose not to...

THIS IS IT. It's about time I think of myself first before anybody else.

Goodbye.

PS.

To whom it may concern, please let me heal first. I thought I healed and moved on but looks like I haven't. It does not really help me that you are still around. Endless comments on my Facebook account. Emailing me random messages of "makes me remember our memories, etc", but when I send a random email of "I miss you" you just shrug it off. Messaging me on Gtalk only if you have time. Telling me you have problems but when I ask you say "I'm talking to God". Talking on Skype for 6 hours. Making me believe we can still work it out in the future.

I want to let you know I am also human and I FEEL. You tell me I am overly dramatic, YES I AM. But I am not overreacting. You deserve this after all the heartbreak and pain. I am tired and sick of waiting and hoping. I need my life back. I need me.