Love oh Love!

In the most unexpected time, you suddenly stumble.... And fall in love.=)

God sure knows how to plan things.

SHAME!

Ever been in a situation where somebody accidentally gave you 20 pesos as change instead of just getting 5 pesos? I usually shout for joy when such incident happens to me. The exact thoughts in my mind: "Yes! Nakaisa ako! YEHEY!!"

But now that it happened to me again, I've lost that old feeling already. I feel ashamed just with the thought of what I would've done. It was so greedy of me to even think of such thing. I'm now hating myself.... a lot.

Why I'm Still Single

I got bored at work today, so I decided to answer a quiz from tickle.com.

The Quiz: Why are you still SINGLE?

I know, it's about my single-ness again, but I couldn't help but post the results here. It just speaks so much about how I feel.

Here's what tickle.com told me:

"Enjel, you're single because you don't want to commit

Once the blush of first love wears off with your partners, do you get a little antsy? You probably crave excitement in all realms of your life, and you need a relationship to keep you filled with possibilities. Let us guess: Someone has probably told you that you haven't quite grown up yet, that you're still holding out for the perfect "whatevers" (job, car, home, date) in your life to come a knockin'. Or perhaps you're just having a difficult time accepting that your comfortable little place in this world is always growing, always evolving — and that means you have to be willing to accept big life changes, too. Not that there's anything wrong with that. After all, you're probably a lot of fun to be around and may be the life of the party. But when it comes to settling down, you leave without looking back twice. Now's the time to ask yourself: Why? What's holding you back? Maybe you don't want someone to get to know you fully? Perhaps by saying "yes" to someone, you're afraid you'll lose yourself, or the possibility of something better coming along. Just remember that the best relationships are those that never stop growing. That's something you can identify with, right? So keep that in mind next time you find someone you're really comfortable with. You never know, it may prove even more exciting once you really get to know each other, teensy flaws and all. "


Haha. One word to describe after reading the results: WHAPAK!

I guess I need to risk IF I do want to get in a relationship. :)

Forever Ms. Matchmaker

I guess everybody who consistently reads my blog knows that I've never had a boyfriend since birth. I never really explained why I don't, but here are some reasons why even up to now, I've never had any dashing prince charming:

• Father Issues: I'm daddy's little princess and that scares some guys away.
• Immaturity issues: Back in college, when it came to issues of love and crushes, I had the heart of a thirteen year-old..... Yes. God knows how many crushes (and obssessions) I had years ago.
• My "Loudness": I guess being too talkative and active in school wasn't so attracting to guys.
• Wrong crowd: My friends say that I hang out with the wrong guys. It's either I meet guys who treat me like a sister...... Or guys make friends with me just because I know a girl they apparently like.

That last statement I just wrote has been a "curse" for me since time immemorial. Guys never made friends with me just because they were interested with me. It was always because I was the friend of this girl they liked or found pretty. It seemed like my name always had to be connected to another girl's name, a girl whom guys usually find "interesting" or "hot". Rarely do I meet guys who wanted to get to know who I am. Instead, I become friends with these guys because they'd like to get to know my friends through me.

I know. It's such a stupid insecurity, but experiencing the same thing over and over again isn't funny anymore. Actually, it gets really sick and tiring that these guys just want nothing but the 411 on my friends that they like. It even gets more annoying to see your crushes make friends with you just to get closer to your "pretty" or "more crushable" friends. What's worse, it REALLY sucks when guys just say hi to you when you happen to be in the company of your "hot" friend while totally forgetting they know you when they bump onto you in the mall alone.

Don't get me wrong. I'm happy for my friends who ended up in each other's arms through me. I'm happy that I was a "key factor" to their beautiful relationships. I've always believed that friendship is more important than my issues with men. I promised myself never to fight with a friend just because I guy I liked ended up liking her. I've always seen myself get over my crushes who end up with my friends. In fact, I still happen to be really close with these girl friends of mine...But how long will I be able to just forget and move on with life? I'm only human. My patience and understanding cannot last forever.

I just cannot be the matchmaker all the time. When will the time come for ME?:(

New Groupie in the House

... I know. It's a humiliating feeling. This is definitely so not me. I just don't go gaga over a band in a night.

THIS IS BAD.

I think I'm officially a Bloomfields groupie!

Well, not that Bloomfields creates annoying music. Don't get me wrong about that! In fact, they really do play happy music! When I heard them sing, it's like I'm being brought back in an era of the Beatles (duh, they play their music). What's greater is they're actually OUR age, so I feel like I can relate to them more. :)

I guess the fact that I keep on visiting their website, google them, and tell everybody about the band makes it weirder.

And perhaps that's what makes me say I'm a groupie in the making.

I wanna go back to Metrowalk on Thursday!!!!!

A Bad Day gone Good :)

Wow. It seemed like God answered my prayers pretty fast! Little did I know that I will be getting all the answers I needed from no one else but my dad. And now I feel WAY WAY WAY better than how I did just hours ago.

I was actually not planning to tell my parents about it. It's a very personal problem and I wouldn't want them going all over me and scolding me about my attitude. Well, my loneliness was too much to be hidden. When they asked me what's wrong, I just cried and cried.

... And that's when dad started talking. Of course, I didn't escape the scolding part. He told me that I should stop thinking and acting this way, that I should get back up and focus. He also shared his experiences in his career, and his colleagues' as well. Most importantly, he told me that it's better to commit mistakes now than in the future.... Actually, my boss tells me that all the time. It's just that hearing it from my father made it more real and relative to me.

I guess the main point of his pep talk was to learn how to love your job and DEFINITELY do your best in it. I emphasized on "definitely" because one (like a certain one like me) can just say that he is trying his best whereas in fact, he really isn't. One's passion and drive to succeed and admit defeat becomes his evidence of doing his best in the work he has. I realized that it's not just proving to your boss that you're capable of doing many things. Many are capable, but only few are capable AND passionate.

For sure a lot of us new grads are on the same boat. We are still neophytes and we still got a lot to prove. You will agree with me that it's not easy. In fact, it will never be easy for us because even if we're out of the four walls we once called our classrooms, we still continue to learn. Only thing is, we're now in the real world, so there's no other way for us to prove to people that we are worth investing in (companies do invest in us... they pay us! :D) except through our actions, unlike in school where we have our grades as proof to our excellence.

And besides, whoever said that one can go straight up the top of the ladder? It's just like playing snakes and ladders. It's very hard to go up the finish line yet so easy to go back at the bottom.

So now, after tripping and falling down, I am ready to face a new challenge once again. I guess I just needed a bit of refueling. I had to go to a pitstop to energize myself and realize that it's not the end of the race yet. It will still be a long journey, AND I AM NOT GIVING UP.

To the numbers, mathematical signs, economics, and finance.... I'm ready.

:)

Bad Day

From the moment I woke up, I knew that this day (September 15, 2006) wouldn't be a very good one.

And I was right.

My bad day started when I first got my top all wet upon leaving the house. I had to go back home and change because the location of the "wet spot" wasn't very nice (I'd resemble a breast-feeding mother... get it?). Because of this, I was late at work, after almost a month of being on-time.

I thought it would just be a normal day at work for me, but NO. I was bombarded by all these scary symbols and figures we refer to as numbers and mathematical signs. Back in school, I have never been a fan of Math, but I have always tolerated them. It has only been now that I have become VERY scared of numbers, especially when some analysis (e.g. finance stuff) is involved.

On top of that, things became worse when I ended up committing a mistake every 30 minutes. I wouldn't do things the right way. I forgot some things due to sleepyness. I didn't answer the phone. I miscalculated the prices. I didn't indicate a few things in my letter. I didn't finish doing my homework. To add up to my bad day, I had a pretty bad throat. My colds were also building up, which made the day "heavier".

To date, this has been the worst working day of my life. I mean, yeah, I had my other bad days at work, but I have never felt so down and lonely with the things I do. I couldn't blame anyone but me for all the mistakes. After all, I was tasked to do something and for some reason I'd end up screwing them up. My confidence level has plunged down to the bottom. It seemed as if I was an airhead in a world full of geniuses and "masters".

You know, it feels so bad when you're expected to do so much when all you could so is just a tidbit of that "so much". That's exactly how I feel now. Even if I try so hard to love what I'm doing, the fact that I just don't have enough confidence in myself pulls me down. I guess there's too much fear in me to conquer this whole new world of fish and prices because it mainly involves a lot of the things I avoided back in college (economics and finance-related matters). I believe I've exerted my best, but just seeing this best of mine to be not enough for what I'm doing fustrates me. It fustrates me to not grasp everything that I'm learning. It fustrates me to just commit so many mistakes and fall all the time. It fustrates me that I am not able to meet their standards, and that I do not love numbers the same way they do. Most of all, it fustrates me because deep inside I KNOW I CAN DO IT, it's just that I lack the confidence to do so.

No, I do not want to quit just yet. As what my friend has told me, it's too early to tell. I've only been at work for 3 months and just getting the hang of it. And besides, I believe that being in this company is good training, and in able for me to grow, I know I'll be needing a lot of training from them. But sometimes, I have to admit that I want to quit and look for a job that suits me better. Then again, I still have three more months to get back on the field and fight. Three months to know what I really want in life.

... And I'll be needing a lot of help from God.

Meet my "sisters"! :)

This is funny. I found from my friends' blogs a link which can identify the people you look like.
After uploading a "prettier" picture of me, I was very impressed with the results...

Look down below and see why. :)



... In fairness!! haha. I shall blog again soon for a more serious discussion. haha :)

The Week that was & The Week that will be

I haven't been able to blog for more than a week now, since there's nothing really "significant" to blog about the past week... Perhaps except for the fact that it's been raining really hard here, and due to the oh-so unpredictable weather, I now have a pretty bad cough that led to my alto-like, un-pitchy bedroom voice.

Other "boring" stories from last week:

• My lunch buddies and I (the Mcdonald's Junkies) realized that for the week that was (last,last week), we ate fastfood almost everyday (thanks to Jollibee, Mcdo, & Greenwich). Because of this, we vowed to eat fastfood only on weekends, since it's quite heavy not only for our stomachs but also for our pockets to have this kind of lifestyle everyday. Imagine, just for our Chickenjoy craving, we had to walk under the drizzle (they say this is more dangerous than the cat-and-dogs type of rain) and spend 110 bucks just for a piece of Chickenjoy, spaghetti, and choco-mallow pie (... will die without dessert! hehe!). Now imagine having to spend 110 bucks for lunch everyday! haha! We also need to save up for our weekends ;) I guess this fastfood frenzy also led to my cough and colds... Damn, if Chickenjoy didn't taste so good!!!
  
• Found out that one of my closest friends is now employed! (Read her story @ http://lola-mo.livejournal.com) I'm so happy for my Pumpkin! She truly deserves this big break, and I know she'll do great! Hoping that all goes well for my soul sister! I hope we push through with our PCD adventure!! waahh!! can't wait for that!!! :)
  
• I finally got my first "real" salary (through my atm, the last one I had to encash at the bank) and it felt really good and bad! Of course, having earned for that made me proud about myself. I can actually earn money for ME! But letting go of it is a different issue. When torn between saving up and buying a pair of pants I've been eyeing on since forever, I ended up not buying them, convincing myself that I won't be using it much anyway. And besides, I guess it won't be bad setting aside that money first... Who knows, I might need it for something more important than a pair of pants. Things I learned from this... PRIORITIZE!!!
  
• Last Saturday was DENTIST DAY (aka DOOMSDAY), and I was scared as hell. Everytime I hear that drilling sound from their "drillers", I get goosebumps. Yet for that Saturday, there was no turning back anymore. I was scheduled for 2 fillings (2 of my molars have cavities.. eeww! But hey, we use our teeth everyday of our lives! hehe), and surprisingly, I didn't feel much pain! (although I get ready for the pain by shouting even if the pain still isn't there. hehe) :) The one at the upper portion was more "nilo" and just thinking about it makes me shiver. I guess my dentist just did a job well done for a scaredycat like me. Now I shall take really good care of my teeth from now on! hehe! :) ... And did I tell you how great it felt that I (yes, out of my hard-earned salary) paid for my dentist bill? haha. How independent of me. But unfortunately, I have an impacted tooth, which will result to a dental surgery next,next week. *goosebumps, shivers, and everything else related to this!* I hope it wouldn't be too painful!!
  

For my upcoming week though, I expect it to be more challenging. I'm now assigned under the logistics department (having done my short stint making documents and going gaga over the difference of a's and a's), and after the briefing, I couldn't believe that there would be MORE work and detail involved with this job. Heck, I never even imagined myself doing something like this! It was really crazy. I just hope I will get through it and survive my crash course of logistics (which apparently, they also refer to as marketing.)

Oh, and another whapack! for today: My officemate and I have this habit of betting, and I end up winning most of the time. For some reason, he blurted out that when it comes to those things, I'm very lucky, but when it comes to love, luck isn't on my side anymore. And it made me think.... Diyos ko, SANA NAMAN HINDI! He definitely did not make my day. If because of that I'd end up unlucky in love, I will haunt him down and plan a "sweet" revenge. Mark my word. HAHA :) (Ouch lang talaga, in short. hehe)

Overprotected

My recent conversation with my officemate has led me wondering about my life. Am I really overprotected? Do I need to get out of my "comfort zone" and explore? What are the better things in life that I have to learn?

Silly, but I just realized how much I've missed on my life. I thought I was happy with the rate my life is going right now, but seeing what's beyond it in the eyes of other people just makes me want to come out of my shell too. I found the urge to conquer my fears and do more courageous and daring things. I want to experience a different way of life, nothing similar to the one I've been used to.... Some things I wish I could do and try to do too:

1.) Join Gawad Kalinga, Children's Hour, or any org that addresses such things,
2.) Try a new sport- maybe Wall Climbing (although I've tried this) or Tennis,
3.) Commute more often (Well, I just walk going to office, but I want to experience riding the bus and jeep and just go to a far, far place and get lost hehe) which leads me to my next point:
4.) Go to Manila (old Manila.. Intramuros, City Hall, Post Office... Malacañang, Pier) and explore
5.) Dance in the rain (although that would take a lot from me, since I'm ombrophobic)
6.) Color my hair (I want it in brown!)
7.) Spend a Sunday on the beach with friends (My Sundays are exclusively for my family.. I'll explain why)
8.) Enroll in a gym or go bellydancing (which I will be most likely doing a week from now)
9.) Go on a date! haha.
10.) Read on current events (well, this is purely due to laziness that I don't read up hehe)

But with parents like mine who resemble the media (who are often referred to as watchdogs of the society), I don't think I shall be seein myself doing these things in the near future. For one, I can't even decide on which celphone I want to get because dad says I get yada-yada! I can't actually blame my parents for being overprotective. But with an excessively overprotected kid (or shall I say lady) like me, going out of my comfort zone is definitely something worth thinking about.

That's why I want to meet someone (no love implied in this case okay? Just anyone!) who's daring enough to make me come out of my shell.

Just My Luck

Don't get me wrong. I am not going to write a review on a movie with the same title, but shall I say, I haven't been feeling any luckier lately as well. For some reason, God has removed me from the list of the "lucky ones" and cut-pasted my name into an entirely different table, that table under the heading, "the UNlucky ones".

My third week at work hasn't been all glam and glitter. I've had my own share of booboo's which have been quite depressing when pondered upon. For one, I realized my "ignorance" on Microsoft Excel and my Powerpoint skills won't bring me anywhere with this kind of work. Having only a cent's worth of knowledge on Excel made work much worse. I only found out about "insert", "delete cells", "drag", "=!B13", and, "book1..." last week. It felt like I was in school all over again, learning more acronyms and shortcuts more than ever!

And as the cherry on top of my "melting" ice cream (melting due to misfortune), I screwed up on my first task under documentations. I was making a draft on this crucial document which, when found with at least one error (misspelled word or even just a difference in the punctuation marks), we will be fined $40.00. I ended up revising it four times because of my stupidity. For one, I never dared to ask questions to my co-workers that might've avoided me from committing this mistake. Also, since all the encoding had to be done on excel, it made matters worse. The never-ending mistakes caused me to have a one-on-one tutorial sessions with a more experienced "docs specialist" (as I would like to call it), and a little bit of sermon from her as well. Although the $40.00 fee was waived (despite having it revised thrice!), it still felt so uneasy to commit a mistake such as this one. Lesson learned: be super detailed and DOUBLE-CHECK!!!!

On the brighter side, I found a new place where I could feast on salads and pastas near work. There's an ala-Oliver's Sandwiches cafe in Orient Square named Plaid, and having lunch there made the day a bit better. I ordered the Lechon Kawali-silog, which was the bomb (only for 95 bucks, which was actually a good buy)! Definitely, I will be back to try their Caesar's Salad. Oh, how I miss eating nothing but salads and bread! But that's another story. =)

I need to get my good luck charms back!!!!

IMC: I Miss Comm!

Last Friday was a blast. I had dinner with my SDL friends at Greenbelt. It was so nice seeing old faces once again. Although it has only been months since we've last seen each other, it felt like I haven't seen them for years. Perhaps everything just seemed so sudden that after getting too used with the faces you see everyday, in a snap of a finger, chances of seeing the whole block together again are rare.

That's why we thought of having a reunion. Only 7 of us were there- Arthur, Ris, Midge, Angela, Nina, Nadine, and I-- nothing felt like being in the company of your SDL buddies. :)

(That's Midge, Artz, yours truly, Nina, Ris, Angela, & Nades)

.. Nadine was right. Everybody basically talked about their current jobs. Arthur, Ris, and Midge, having gotten into 5th year, are currently residents at Unilever, Loewe, and ARC, respectively. Nina's with Club Media, while Nadine is still searching for THAT job. Angela also happened to bring along her oh-so-cute baby boy, Yuan (or Johann), who looked a lot like his dad. She's continuing her studies in UA&P, but not with SDL. She could've had more fun with us! hee hee.

I found out how much fun they're having with their jobs, and how much IMC is applicable in the field that they're into (duh, it's advertising! hehe). It thrilled me to see how enthusiastic they were everytime they'd tell their office stories. I, on the other hand, had a different story.

Being in another field, I kinda felt out-of-place not being able to share anything IMC-related. I admit that sometimes, it feels a bit depressing that I'm not able to apply anything I've learned in the job I have now. It makes me miss all those market research and concept development we're used to back in college. Now, I have to deal with capitals, currencies, accounting, and Microsoft Excel when all I knew back then was limited to psychographics, share of voice, sweet spot, and Microsoft Powerpoint.

Having this kind of dillemma sometimes makes me wonder how work would be like if I got in an IMC-related job. Could've I been happier applying everything I've learned and limiting myself to these alone? Would sticking to what I know make me happy? Or will I regret not learning more about other fields instead?

Don't get me wrong. I love my job. I enjoy learning a lot about export and tuna. It made me realize how much knowledge is available out there for me to learn. Heck, if not for my current work, I wouldn't even bother knowing what the oceans of the world are! ... which, by the way, are the ff: Pacific, Atlantic, Indian, Arctic, and Southern (I all along thought it was Antartic, now they call it Southern!)

I guess getting into this job gives me an opportunity to widen my horizons. Looking at it strategically (long-term!hehe), learning about the world market actually gives me a glimpse of how every market is different (and similar!) from one another. It's not enough for me to stay inside my shell and depend on what I know. Getting into export allows me to expand my knowledge not only within my own bubble, but bursting this bubble and going beyond it. :) As my mom would always remind me, "It doesn't mean that if you're an Advertising graduate, you stick to that field. Explore. Try to learn more. Who knows, you'll end up doing something totally different but still loving it."

Now I feel better. :)

I've been tagged!

Thanks to Nadine and Midge, now it's my turn to tell you some things about me;)
Here's how it works:

"Once you’ve been tagged, you have to write 8 facts/things/habits about yourself, saying who tagged you. In the end you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. No tag backs."

• I'm SUPER scared of anything related to RAIN. Call me a coward, but I've had ombrophobia since high school, thanks to an unforgettable experience. I was once flirting around school (yes i was. haha.) when suddenly, it rained like cats and dogs. My friends were able to find shelter, while I was left drenched in the rain. I was already crying by the time I found a roof. A few days after that, I had the worst cough ever (which actually resulted to my allergies/asthma which required me to take an dose of inhaler twice a day). From that day on, I swore I'd never put myself under a situation where I'll be soaked with rain.
• I'm a sweets addict. Anyone can bribe me with chocolates and candies. One trip to Candy Corner will definitely make my day. A meal wouldn't be complete without dessert. :) I just love how sweets can make you go all hyper and happy and.... sweet. :)
• I have a mole in my earhole... Many people actually think it's an earring. Some even thought it was cancerous (hell, I've had it since I was a kid! hehe) But I'm proud to say that having a mole in that special spot makes me one of a kind :) FYI, it's on my right earhole.
• And speaking of ears... I have attached ears! If most people have "hanging" ears, then I have alien-like ears. For some reason the lower part of my ears are directly attached to the sides, so you wont see "excess" fats hanging. It's like the shape of a half-heart. Weird, but unique ;)
• I was once cast under the spell of three brothers who had a band named Hanson. Damn, you should've seen how my room looked like 8 years ago! I even had remnants of my Hanson days on my study table... I couldn't remove the official Hanson stickers anymore! haha. (gosh, I even remember buying them for 2 dollars!) I even have a complete set of Hanson trivia books, Mmmbop to the Top (the first unofficial biography of Hanson), copies of all the singles (in cd) and the albums Middle of Nowhere (both in cd and tape), Snowed In (tape), and this other album they released (in tape). I also collected pin-ups of Taylor and Zac, memorized every song in Middle of Nowhere, and predicted which single was to be released the next... See, I've had my "teenybopper" moments too ;)
• Happy thought for the day: Being the ombrophobic that I am, I got stuck in Ministop after it started to rain like cats and dogs. I was in Ministop for around 20 minutes, and I was already a bit hopeless that I would be able to make it home for the next 30 minutes when suddenly Kuya Tap from Ministop approached me and lent me his umbrella. That was such a nice thing to do! It inspired me to spread the lovin' and do a good deed towards others too :)
• I have never had a boyfriend since birth. For some reason, no guy has ever admitted to me straight to the face that he had feelings for me, or that he ever liked me in one way or another. Heck, I've never even been out on a REAL date! Where art thou my dear soulmate?
• And last but not the least.... I've studied in 8 schools... and counting! I've lived all over the country and studied in 8 schools, namely: Learning Child Paranaque, Corpus Cristi School Cagayan de Oro, Lourdes College Cagayan de Oro, Ateneo de Davao University, St. Paul College- Pasig, St. Benedict Childhood Education Centre -Cebu, St. Theresa's College- Cebu, and UA&P. OA diba? I intend to add one more school in that roster... For an MBA perhaps? ;)

Wow, I enjoyed answering that :) And so, for the following people, now it's YOUR turn to spread the taggin'!! ---> Merky, Jackie G., Diane Flaviano, Yeni, Monique, and Darah! Well, I hope you read this ;)

SWOT Analysis

Having taken Marketing Management classes back in junior year made me think that maybe I could make my very own SWOT analysis of myself. Made me realize a lot about myself. Hehe.

SWOT Analysis: Angel

Strengths: Corny jokes, Bringing Smiles, Creating Music, & Stalking
Weaknesses: Sports, Matters of the heart, & Shutting-up
Opportunities: Have friends and family for love and support
Threats: Rice and Men that make life more complicated. Go figure.

Ladies and gentlemen, meet Angel=)

First Day High

For the whole summer, I had nothing in mind but getting a job ASAP. I went all around Makati and Ortigas to drop resumes and try my luck in just about any company I get interested with. At the beginning, it was very disappointing because I got rejected by the media agency that I really wanted to get into (never even got an interview! must have failed the exam). It got more disappointing because I never get callbacks from most agencies that requested me for an interview (therefore realizing the fact that I'm not meant for the advertising industry). What's more, after passing the exam of a multinational company (thus giving me an opportunity to go on with the next step-- the interview), I receive an email from this company, saying that I am not fit for their company, that after reviewing my resume, I am not what they're looking for.

Little did I know that I would end up with "fish" and "tuna" written all over me. After a long period of waiting, I received a call from a company I didn't even remember giving a resume to. I decided to give it a shot (didn't even know the opening I applied for!) and show up for the interview and the exam a few days after. Eventually, I found out that the opening was for an International Sales Officer, and the first thing that came to my mind was, "Wow, makakatravel ako pag nakapasok ako dito!" True enough, I did. I guess I made a statement during the panel interview, or maybe I did well in the exams.... Or maybe, the job was just meant for me.

And so, today was my first day at work. Like most people would say, first day of work would be boring. You'd pretend to do something or keep yourself busy just because everybody's doing so. Actually, I was busy during my first day... busy interviewing everybody in the department. For my first day "high", I had to get to know everybody (All the ate's, kuya's, sir's, and tita's... shempre ako ang baby! hehe!) to give me a glimpse of the how everything works. This required me to bring out the Kris Aquino in me, and sure it was effective! I found out so many things about my officemates that it felt like I knew them for a long time already. I guess I was just lucky to work with people like them because it's rare to find people whom you can really relate and effectively communicate with. After a whole day of interviews (finished around 330), I did my favorite pastime..... surf the internet. But it wasn't just the usual surfing. I found myself surfing for tuna. =)

Can't wait for tomorrow!!!=)

On Firsts and Lasts.

What a day.

My day started with my last driving lessons, and in fairness, my engine only went out once. From my last class, it was such a disaster! I felt useless on the driver's seat because my teacher was the one who basically did everything from the steering wheel to the brakes. My only control was the clutch, which I wasn't very good at. Surprisingly, I was more focused today, and I maintained an average speed of 25km/h.... I conquered EDSA and the small streets of Pasig. BUT, I lost my focus when we were uphill... in Robinson's Pioneer. hehe.=)

After driving, I decided to give myself a reward. Before heading off for some interviews (some racket I temporarily needed just to get money hehe), I passed by Chocolate Clothing Co. in Mega. Turns out Havaianas had tons of new stocks in the store, and I was overwhelmed by the colors and the designs. I've been wanting a pair for the longest time, but I wouldn't dare purchase one with my own money yet. I think I'd rather buy shoes than buying tsinelas. I also have a hard time choosing which one to buy, with so much choices available to feast on. I can't decide if I should buy brown, pink, yellow, or the printed Havaianas! But today was a different story. I ended up buying one in metallic fuschia pink. Technically, this is part of my brother's "graduation gift", most of which I spent on shoes and slippers=) Also, I figured that I really wanted my slippers in fuschia pink, perfect for almost any attire I have in my closet. Oh, I just love my Havaianas=)

... And then we had chorale. Today was also our last rehearsals. We tried to keep a happy atmosphere despite knowing that it's actually our last rehearsal as the UA&P Chorale. We'll also be having our last concert tomorrow, Sanctuary, in Philam Life Auditorium. Anyway, rehearsals ended in a very dramatic way. Master gave out a few words, while we had an AVP for him and a few messages. Being my vocal self, I decided this was my chances of thanking and saying sorry to Master for not giving my best. I ended up crying..... Heck, everyone was crying. Chorale has already been a ritual for me (for everyone too), and ending it this way was too painful. It was so sad to see Master leave just like that. And I felt a bit guilty realizing that I missed so much of rehearsals and concerts, not making the most out of all of these.

But then, maybe, this happened for a reason. Perhaps Master was destined for greater things, and we're destined to learn from this. For sure, I'll miss chorale A WHOLE LOT, and I'll miss the kind of love for music Master wanted us to have like him. I'll definitely miss vocalizing and singing like everything's all right. I'll miss the after-chorale bonding sessions, all the silly talks we'd have of divicis and SATB's. I never thought of the immense impact the chorale had in my life until now. I feel like losing a big part of me, at the same time, I feel gaining so much from this. Master has taught me to stand up to what I believe in, to stay committed and dedicated to things I love doing. In case Master reads this, I'd like to say THANKS, once again, for being a teacher, mentor, and an inspiration to all of us.

UA&P Chorale @ NAMCYA 2005

"For as long as I have music,

As long as there's a song for me to sing,

I can find my way, I can see a brighter day,

The music in my life will set my spirit free!"

-As Long As I Have Music

Off to Driving School! Part 1

Since I was 18, I've been bugging my dad to make me take driving classes. Although I don't have a car or anything, I knew that someday I'd have to face the "terror" of learning how to drive, and I wanted to get it done and over with. For two years, I have constantly brought up the topic over dinner but I was never successful with it. He would tell me how he wouldn't see me anywhere in the house because I'd already be off somewhere else. And as my dad would like to say most of the time, "_________ can lead to many things, therefore watch Star Wars!" (labo.)

So finally, after the very long duration of pleads and "sige na dad!'s", I was able to convince him that I should learn how to drive. What better reason than to say that it's a required skill for a good job in sales? Of course, he would want that for me too.... He had no other choice.

That's why last week, I enrolled for driving classes at A1. From the moment I got my student's permit, I already had my own share of boo-boos and embarrassing moments.

Boo-boo #1: Cause I'm Only Seventeen!

From the moment I got in the driving school, they asked me if I was only 16. I didn't know if I would be happy about it or not! My exact words were, "Hindi! 20 na ako! Kaya siguro hindi pa ako nakakakuha ng trabaho." They ended up debating why I looked younger. Someone said it was because of the headband, and the other lady said it was because of my bangs. Now she wanted to have bangs like mine. haha. And just when one of their officemates came in, they let him guess how old I was. Although it could be seen in another perspective (being a compliment), I just couldn't help but be embarrassed by it.

Boo-boo #2: Click!....Ay, Wala Pala!

After that some kinda funny incident at the driving school, we headed off to LTO in San Juan. II was not my usual self in the car. I was really quiet because I was with two other girls who kept on talking about accounting and all these liabilities and budgets I was allergic to. It was actually a struggle for me to listen to them for 15 minutes. When we got to LTO, we still had to wait for another 15-20 minutes to get our pictures taken. After a few trips to Yamin-land thanks to my ipod, I was finally called for my picture taking. I was really excited because I already wanted to go to the mall and go window shopping after. But I didn't expect that it would take me 15 minutes more. When I got to the photo booth, I was my usual happy self. I was already posing even if they didn't tell me to do so yet. Perhaps the webcam got scared of me because just as the camera were about to say "Smile!", the camera got busted. We tried and tried again, and still, no "flash" from the camera. They told me to take a seat again and wait for another 15 minutes. When I got back, it took another 3 tries before the camera took my picture.

Boo-boo #3: Para!!!!

I was really excited and tensed for my first driving classes because this was my first time to actually drive a car. Kuya Serge, my teacher, decided that we do some practice driving in Gold Loop because there were less cars and it was perfect for the lesson, since I would still be sticking to first gear for that day. So there I was, in first gear, going round and round Gold Loop until someone told us to stop. Apparently, we got caught by the police who was just looking for some money to eat. He told us that we were not allowed to practice in this area because we were "obstructing traffic". So much for the last 3 cars we saw in Gold Loop. I got really pissed with the policeman and just gave him my student's permit and my teacher's license. After taking a look at it, he decided not to give us a ticket because I lived just around the area. Weird, yet unsuccessful for him. Buti nga.

These experiences made me realize how I'd rather commute and walk than drive a car. It feels weird to get caught by the police. It's like you've done something really really bad. Driving is such a complicated matter. You need to really focus on what you're driving, especially if you're driving a manual car. Perhaps my dad did have a reason why he didn't want me to learn driving at an earlier age... haha. But I will not make these hindrances. I'll continue to do my best in driving. At the same time, I'll make it more memorable and fun too. haha. It just shows how much of a comedy my life is. I think I'm planning to change this into: "Ah, the comedy in life." Guess it's more appropriate that way. hee hee.

Til my next lesson.=)

Reunited (and it feels so good!)

For my four-year stay in UA&P, never have I experienced having so many circle of friends in my whole life. I have my sdl gang (that's me, the cool geeks, and the front row girls), the chorale (kai, aiza, and the rest), 5th year pals (bran, tin, miko, etc.), theater-mates(Viare & Roc friends), dorm buddies (302 girls), and my block o friends (me, reg, anna, maan, kerin, avs, & mei). Unfortunately, due to some unforeseen circumstances (blame it on our majors), I do not get the chance to hang out with most of my friends all the time.

That's us in our younger years...
(Maan, Reg, Kerin, Mei, & Anna Banana)

That's why I was so thrilled about my friend Mei's surprise party. For some reason, we always have reunions on birthdays (we had a block o reunion during my 20th birthday). It was a chance for us 6 to hang out once again after around 2-3 years of separation (OA!haha.). Kerin organized a very simple surprise party and only Mei's closest friends were invited. I almost didn't make it, but I guess it was meant to be. I was supposed to be singing with the chorale but being the pasaway that I am, I was booted off for that performance. Anyway, I decided to go to the surprise party and I did not regret every single moment of it. Reg and I were the first ones to arrive at Ahmed's place (Kerin's friend). I was really embarrassed because it was my first time to meet him and I get really tensed when I'm around people who speak English really well. I have this thing with English-speaking people. When they're around, I freeze. Not that I don't know how to converse in English, it's just that I'm scared of making mistakes that's why I really think about what I say before I say it out loud. And to think more than half of the people there were english-speaking. Training ba ito? hehe.

Eventually, people started to arrive. Maan and Brian arrived after around 20 minutes, and Anna followed. While waiting, we rehearsed the "surprise" for Mei twice, watched Gremlins 2, took pictures (Kerin's friends are big camera whores), and updated each other on our lives. When Mei arrived, there was more chaos. Everybody was just talking and talking at the same time, eating sushi and chips. We also played Mario Party wherein our tracing skills were tested to the extreme. haha! It was such a fun and great night for all.

What actually made it really fun and memorable was that I got the chance to hang out with my close friends again. I miss how we would talk as if we all had hearing problems. Laughing like nobody else was there was another usual thing we'd do (we were once kicked out of a restaurant due to excessive laughter). Just comes to show what kind of friendship we had and will continue to have. I guess this is the start of a rekindled friendship. And I hope there'll be more of this in the future;)

I love you guys!!=)

That's us from Mei's Surprise Bash!! Cute no?:)

Nothing much has changed, maybe except for the hairstyles.. haha.

My Favorite Movies

http://www.hotfreelayouts.com/movies.php


As you can see, I enjoy romantic comedies, comedies, and more romantic comedies! I prefer shallow, feel-good movies that can just make my day=) I guess the only "serious ones" here would be "Eternal Sunshine..." and "Lost..." =)

Gotta love 'em!=)

Cleanin' Up My Closet

Last night, I finally had the chance to go through my "trash" of memories and throw whatever was unnecessary already. It was such a fun experience to see lots of old stuff which actually meant a lot for one part of my life (some still having much importance until now). Of the many things I discovered from last night, here are the most special and funniest among the bunch which I opted to keep for now=):


♥ A LOVE Letter from my Soul Sister

Haha, it never really ocurred to me how long Nadine and I have known each other until last night. It seems that most of my memories with her come from my senior year, but from last night, I figured that we have actually been good friends back in second year! haha! Anyway, I couldn't help but laugh when I found a letter from her for Valentine's day 2004, complete with the "Mikee" signature of hers (the one with the horse haha). Apparently, Nadine and I have been sharing memories since second year because of Sierra Lakes. I was the very, very pasaway stage manager, and Nadine acted as well. I also found out that Nadine also watched my play at that time! That was very touching, since not much people were able to catch that.=) What was really funny about this letter was that most of what she wrote actually came true!!! She wrote about how she wished we both get into IMC and how she looks forward to our sleepovers and bonding moments. She also wrote about not spending valentine's alone, pigging out on ice cream and junk food (hmmm, that's familiar!!haha!). Seeing the letter truly proved how far our friendship already went, if you know what I mean. Haha. Kidding. I love Nadine for this (how i wish I could just type that horse-ish signature she made in the letter so I could show it here! haha)

♥ "Hola! Que tal?" Memories

No, I didn't find anything given to me by a Spanish-speaking friend, but I found tons of papers, photocopies, and quizzes for my Spanish class back in 2nd year. I got really good marks for my Spanish, especially during Spanish102. I also found a yellow pad wherein we wrote the draft for our short class skit with AA and Alessa. In the skit, AA was supposed to play the el divino (fortuneteller), and Alessa and I made a visit to Senor El Divino. haha. It was so funny to read it. I couldn't help but remember how Señor Teddy couldn't help but laugh on our funny antics, even AA was named Best Actor for this. haha.=)

♥ The IMC Life

My IMC life also slowly unfolded itself in front of me in the form of handouts and readings. One by one, I found various papers and readings for Marcomm, IMC Principles, Direct Marketing, and Communication Law. I apparently found some sheets of paper which have been missing when I once needed them. I found our script for Bling and the City (complete with Nadine's handwritten editing), research sheets for our Toyota Vios campaign (around 50 handwritten interviews.. in the flesh! haha!), and the newspapers we used for our Comm. & Soc. analysis. It seemed like once again, I was brought back to the terror that was IMC, the kind of terror that you'll miss a lot, now that you're not doing anything.=)

♥ Souveneir Programs... with Autographs!

Every moment I had with theater was significant. Seeing my old souveneir programs from plays which I have been a part of (both onstage and back) made me cherish these memories more. I figured out how much of my life once revolved in the idea of TDRs and acting workshops. It was very touching to read the messages of the people you once worked with in a play. Ah, the euphoria of theater, I miss. :(


♥ Doodles Galore!

Back in second year, our favorite pastime while listening to the teacher would be doodling and making nonsense. AA, my seatmate back then, would make hillarious drawings of me with my trademark "hoop" earrings, or with Elaine my "best friend", or just whatever. Because they were just so funny, I guess I decided to keep them way back, and I found them once again. My ultimate favorite among the many doodles would be the one wherein AA placed captions on the carpark pamphlets which had a picture of the Scooby Doo family, complete with the Mystery Caravan. Another favorite would be AA's own version of the movie, "Sabik sa Mangga" and "Elaine's Circus featuring Regina the Ballerina."HAHA! Only AA can think of those things. haha! I miss him already!

There were still so many funny and memorable things (2-year old Blueskies crackers, old mascara, a photocopy of my application form for IMC) that were found on this day. I ended up throwing only around 1/8 of the "junk" I had. I think I'll be doing this again for more exercise. haha.=)

An Angry Not-So-Little UA&P Graduate

Yesterday, I signed up for pinoyexchange.com's message boards so I could check out a few updates on the chorale scene. While surfing, I stumbled upon one thread with the topic, "BIG 5 Schools". As I was reading the messages, it was quite flattering to see that a couple of them agree that UA&P is part of this so-called "Big 5". But as I read along, what I saw wasn't much candy for my eye anymore.

It was a bit irritating to see how until now, many people still think most UA&P students have an "elitist" attitude. They say that UA&P is just trash, and that walang kwenta rin naman daw. I'm sorry to disagree on this, not only because I'm a graduate of this university. It was just disappointing to see how different their notion was of our university whereas in fact, we're really not what they think we are.

I couldn't help but reply, and here's how my reply went:

"As a UA&P graduate, it kinda hurts to see that kahit ngayon, nakatatak pa rin sa isip ng mga tao na elitist kami.

With my 4-year stay in the university, I can really say we're not. I admit, I had the same fear when I entered the university, pero alam nyo, dapat ma-experience nyo mismo na kahit papano, we still have a diverse community. Iba rin ang UA&P experience kasi dahil mas maliit siya as compared to most universities, and bago. Although we don't have that school spirit and history that most of you guys can boast of, that doesn't necessarily mean that UA&P can only produce elitist gradutes. As proof, alam nyo ba na karamihan ng mga ads na pinapanood nyo ay galing sa isip ng UA&P Grad? Taga-UA&P rin ang nag-conceptualize ng Hotshots. Tama nga ung sabi earlier, many graduates get accepted in Citibank as well.

I'm not saying that UA&P should be included in the BIG5 kasi one way or another, people will really try to include THEIR school in that list. I think what we should be more concerned of is making our schools proud by contributing to the good image that we want our schools to have:)

That's about it.=)"

Roar.

The Only Rose Among the Thorns

It feels really bad to be left out, to be the only rose among the thorns... Perhaps this phrase would only apply to a man being surrounded by women, but I guess in my case, I can be the only rose among the thorns. You'll see why.

Meet the Santos clan:
That's my cousin Juno, me, Jus, my brother, Kyra, Den, & Kimmy (the picture's pretty outdated, taken around 5-7 years ago). At first glance, you might wonder why from this little bundle of cousin-hood (we're a pretty small family!), I'm the only rose among the thorns... Actually, I'm the only rose among the thorns because I am the only one in the family who is still single (well, Kimmy's an exception. He's only 10.haha.).

It kinda depressed me to know that I, being the third eldest among the gang, had no one to cuddle with in family gatherings. It's been a thing in our get-togethers to bring boyfriends and girlfriends along. Instead of "boyfriend" bondings, I would end up having cousin bondings with Kimmy whom I play Monopoly with while everybody's enjoying their dates. At times, I end up being the third wheel (forever!), which is fun nevertheless. It also pisses me off how my lola and my aunt would ask me if I already have a boyfriend, and that I'm hiding "him" from them. Heck, I even don't have a love life to start off with! One time, I even heard my mom talking to my other cousin and telling her how she prays that I get a boyfriend already. Wow. As if that's easy.

Pressure?!?! Maybe not. Even if it bothers me that everyone's with someone already, I actually don't feel the need to have somebody right now. With all this commotion as regards job hunting, I don't think I would want someone meddling in my life yet... Who knows, when everyone of them is already single, I would be the only one who's attached??:) Again, that would be another case of being the only rose among the thorns. haha.=)

Butterflies in My Stomach... Once Again!!

It's been a while since I last felt butterflies in my stomach. The last time I remember having this exact feeling was 3 months ago... Believe me, that's a bit long for me already! hehe.

Actually, I miss the feeling of being "kilig". I know it's pretty shallow to write about it, but I just couldn't discount these feelings I have right now. I'm sorry, but I have to be a bit cheesy in the upcoming paragraphs. haha.

Remember Mr. 17-years-older-than-me guy I was talking about a few entries ago? After months of not hearing from him, he texted me today. He was asking about our upcoming gigs this month. Of course, when I read his message, I didn't expect to hear from him! The moment I saw his name on the screen, I really wanted to jump up and down at the mall... I couldn't do that, there were too many people around me, including my clueless lola. haha.

He told me that he was in Cebu right now and that he would be back here tomorrow morning. I couldn't say anything but tell him how much I miss my hometown. He talked about how he loved Cebu, and I wanted to tell him how much I wanted to be with him in Cebu... DUH. I could NEVER say that. hehe. And then we reached Philippine Idol. I told him I wanted to pursue my dream, and that he would want to go with me if there was no age limit. haha.

... And then I think I made a boo-boo. When he texted me about the age limit, I replied something like this:

"Age limit? I think so. But that's okay, you look really young for your actual age."

After that, I didn't hear from him again. Was age a sensitive topic for him? I was really praying hard that he would text me back.... Well, I texted him again, telling him that what I said was just a joke. I guess he has a different sense of humor, considering the big age gap that we have. haha.

Perhaps I can wait until tomorrow. Let's see.=)

(I can still feel the butterflies in my stomach!! hee hee!!!)

Shuffle Your Personality

this is funny. i got this from daene and shara's blog. i'll just copy-paste what daene wrote from her blog:

"How it works is, you put your music player of choice on shuffle/random. Then you have to say/read each of the questions below and press play. The song that plays is the answer to your question."

...Now I'm scared. Most of my songs in my ipod are jologs. damn that autofill.

1. How does the world see me?

Milkshake-Kelis

"My milkshake brings all the boys in the club,
uh, damn right, it's better than yours"

... They're really better than yours! haha kidding...hmm, makes sense to me!!! hahahaha. ask my friends why this makes sense. hehe.=)

2. Will I have a happy life?

We've Got it Going On- Backstreet Boys

... Told you I was jologs!! haha. This was actually the first single of BSB. Does this mean I'll have a career in music too?? hahaha.=)

"If you really want to sing, we can do for you ahhh...
We've got it going on for years"

-Yes I can!!! hehe.

3. What do my friends really think of me?

Fill Me In- Craig David

"You were just doing things that people in love do,
Parents trying to find out what you're gonna do."

... Grabe naman. I was not creeping out late last night!!!! haha. But then again, I might be in the jacuzzi. haha.=) Oh, and I have not done anything that people in love do, if you know what I mean!! haha! Crazy!

4. Do people secretly lust after me?

Iingatan Ka- Carol Banawa

"Iingatan ka, aalagan ka
Sa puso ko, ikaw ang pag-asa"

... Subtle lustin'? Ha! Whatever.

5. How can I make myself happy?

Hed Kandi (Kaskade)- Feeling the Night

"Feel love...Nothing could ever be right,

your love's feeling the night"

... That's why my prince charming should start looking for me!! haha!=)

6. What should I do with my life?
KLSP- Sponge Cola

"Kailanan lang pagbigyan, Kulang Lang sa Pansin"

... My message to employers. Kulang lang po ako sa pansin. I just need a job! Please forgive me. haha!

7. Will I ever have children?
Real-Plumb

"I am hungry for something that will make me real,
desperately searching for something real"

... I guess I need someone real first before I can pro-create. HAHAHA.

8. What is some good advice for me?
If the Feeling is Gone- Kyla

"All I ask is just a little honesty,
though I know that you're not coming back for me.
You know, I'll do everything to make you stay,
But I just have to let you know, if the feeling is gone"

... Believe me, that feeling is gone=) And he will never come back for a long, long, time=)


9. How will I be remembered?

Fever- Michael Buble

"Oohh, you give me fever!
Fever when you kissme, fever all through the night"

... Ooohh, I guess my Ponti moment will always be unforgotten (inside joke friends! hehe). Cause I give fever when I kiss you!!! Fever all through the night! HAHA! Pandora, here we come!!=)

10. What is my signature dancing song?

Kaskade- Safe

"If your love is safe..."

.. Now I'm actually dancing to this tune!!! Love it!! Now, why does everything have to do with love?? haha. Again, calling my prince charming!!

11. What do I think my current theme song is?

Put It On Me- Ja Rule

"What would I be without you?"

... My theme song for my mom and dad, sans the whole meaning of the song, just that specific line. hehe=)

12. What does everyone else think my current theme song is?

Heartbreaker- Dionne Warwick

"Why do you have to be a heartbreaker,
was it a lesson that I never knew"

... How I wish it were true!! Haha. I believe I have never broken anyone's heart yet! It was more of the other way around (one-way love, my friend...) haha.

"How can I love you when you're not around?"

... For the nth time, PRINCE CHARMING!!! haha.

13. What song will play at my funeral?

Stay- Carol Banawa

" I want you to stay, never go away from you. Stay forever,
And now, now that you're gone, all I can do is pray for you,
To be here beside me again.."

... I'm a big Carol Banawa fan. I'd love for her to sing this song when I die. I have a feeling my future boyfriend will have this as his theme song at my deathbed. hehe.=)

14. What type of women/men do I like?
Temporary Madness- Jodie Brooke Wilson

"Temporary madness fools your heart,
Cupid's arrow cuts right through you,
Sentimental fool that's who you are"

... I SO agree.=)No long-term crush for me.

15. What type of men/women do I like?
Tao- Sugarfree

"Pare-pareho lang tayo, pare-pareho lamang tao.."

... Malamang.=) Having a crush on a dog would be another story.

16. What is my day going to be like?
Pretty Boy- M2M

"I lie awake at night,
see things in black and white...
I lie awake and pray,
that you would come my way"

... I told you I was jologs! And what a nice way to end this entry. It's already 2 am, and M2M's right. But then again, pretty boys are scary. They might be more inclined to being pretty than with being a boy. haha.=)

I really enjoyed this!!! I'll do this again soon=)
Thanks Midge and Kurly! haha!!

Quiz addict

More of these quizzes.. hehe. They're just so fun to answer!! =)

Your Inner Pop Princess Is Beyonce

"Tonight I'll be your naughty girlI'm callin all my girlsGonna turn this party outI know you want my body." You've got the talent, looks, and attitude to get to the top of the charts.

Who's" Your Inner Pop Princess?

ooohhh, i'm one naughty girl ;)

You'll Find Love Through Friends

Your friends get you better than any guy ever hasAnd they're the perfect people to introduce you to your soulmateSo look and act you're best with them, even if it's a girl's night outYou never know who they might find for you!

Where Will You Find Love?

friends... hmmm???

You Should Date An Italian!

You love for old fashioned romance, with an old fashioned guyAn Italian guy is the perfect candidate to be your prince charmingIf your head doesn't spin enough, just down another espresso with himInvest in a motorcycle helmet - and some carb blocker for all that pasta!

Which Foreign Guy Should You Date?

You Should Be With a Water Sign!

Your best match is a Cancer, Scorpio, or Pisces Why? You crave intimacy and connection in your relationshipAnd while most guys can't open up enough for you, a Water Sign canNot that you're whole relationship will be soul gazingA Water Sign matches your goofy sense of humor - and desire to help others.

What Sign Should You Date?

calling all men with these signs. hehe =) kidding =)

You are a Mild Mama

You don't have to be screaming at the top of your lungs to have a good timeYou rather chill, soak in the moment, and appreciate life for what it isGuys appreciate your "take life as it comes" approach...(Though they wouldn't mind if you got a little wild from time to time!)

How Daring Are You?

You are a No Drama Mama!

No need for drama, you just chill out and don't let things bother youYou've got a peaceful, zen-like attitude... even when things get crazyYou're a pleasure to be around, and you have lots of friends to show for itYou don't need to be the center of attention, you're happy enough as is!

Are You a Drama Queen?

i don't believe this. i think im a drama princess. hehe=)

til my next quiz......

Conversations over Popcorn and Doom

Last Thursday, I had a great night with my mom and my "kuya" (actually my uncle, but the age gap's not that big). Apparently, "kuya" had to sleepover at our place because everybody back at his home left him in their not-so-singles' pad. Wawa was off to Tagaytay to enjoy her hobby, madjong, which at the same time socializing with her friends. My 40-something uncle went to Davao to re-live his younger days with a younger love (having relationships with quite a big age gap is pretty common in our family... please refer to my older posts;D). Tita, on the other hand, "visited" her sister in Hong Kong with a certain someone *ahem ahem*.

So there we were, in the dining room/sala, my mom playing solitaire at the same time chitchatting with us. Kuya was getting hold of the white cheese popcorn, multitasking because while he wanted to watch Doom on dvd, he was also up for some kwentos as well. I thought that it was a great time to reminisce and just talk about the good, old days...

You see, kuya lived with us for a few years when dad was assigned in Cagayan de Oro. I remember I was 4 years old at that time, astonished with everything that was going on around me. We lived in a neighborhood where everybody practically knew each other. My then best friend lived two blocks away from me. Kuya, who was then around 12, had a gang of boys who were trying so hard to be like men. My mom had her own group of friends that reminded me of the Desperate Housewives sans the desperation. It was the perfect "provance" life I knew of.

My 2-year stay in CDO was actually part of my fondest memories as a child. I would remember going around our village and crossing the other village separated by a highway with a traysikad to visit the nearby "beach" with my neighbors. On other days, we would set up the kiddie pool in our spacious and beautiful garden, imagining we had an actual swimming pool with the water hose as a fountain. I also remember staying up late on Saturday nights to catch the live US feed of Saturday Morning Cartoons on ABC (Darkwing Duck.. loved it!!).

During the conversation over Solitaire and Doom, these fond memories of mine were brought back to life. I realized how much kuya still remembers about his first love (the sister of my best friend) yet not remembering how he would tell me tons of jokes and stories that I once believed in. Mom would then reminisce on how we would spend the night at the neighbor's with the grown-ups watching PBA and the kids playing around the house. Next thing we knew, we were laughing our heads off thanks to the "chicks" kuya had for his Science project, which led to my memories of Lola Lita (our laundrywoman who chewed tobacco occasionally) taking hold of a live chicken's feet, getting it ready for the next tinola....

It was actually fun remembering all these things during that night. It's been quite a while since I last thought about how fun my childhood was. Unfortunately, we had to leave CDO and eventually make Davao our home. But then again, that's another trip to memory lane over solitaire, Doom, and white cheddar popcorn. :)

Love Oh Love...

This is interesting. haha. :)

You'll Find a Boyfriend Within a Year

Either you're not ready for a relationship... Or you're not quite ready to leave the house You can't meet a guy from your couch So at least consider meeting one from your computer!

When Will You Meet Your Next Boyfriend?

You Don't Have a Boyfriend Because You are Too Busy

While a relationship sounds nice, you're strapped for time Whether you're legitimately busy or just making excuses... ... You don't give men enough of your time. As nice as "instant love" would be, there's just no such thing.

Why Don't You Have a Boyfriend?

So much for my love life... :)

Bumming Around...

It's 1:30 in the morning. I am about to sleep til it hit me... I am still up in the wee hours of the morning, not because I have a pitch the next day, but just because....ummm... wala lang.

Sad to say, I am still awake for no reason at all. It struck me how much of a bum I have become.
I am so not used to just staying at home, pigging out with all the chocolates I could take hold of (I just nibbled some a while ago. HA!), watching my favorite TV shows, & catching up on missed dvds (I promised myself I'd finish that bunch of dvds I never got the chance to watch). During my sophomore and junior years, you wouldn't find me in my pad. I would be home at around midnight because I spent the whole night at Starbucks or just somewhere outside of my home. On Sundays, I end up doing homework at 11pm just because I was out the whole day. As a kid, my mom would tell me how I couldn't stay at home and have Ayala Cebu as my second home...

And now, look where I am... While most of my friends are soaking under the sun and partying in Bora, I am stuck at home, making up for my missed sleep and domestic life. Staying at home and staring at the computer... O buhay bum.

I have to admit, I am getting the hang of it too. I am starting to enjoy staying at home all by myself. After a stressful senior year, it's about time I do things that I actually enjoy doing... at home. I have done nothing but squeeze my brain to the extreme the past year. I guess I just deserve this break for now.

Bumming around actually gives me a slice of independence (what I lost during my senior year) as well. At the same time, it gives me more privacy, something I am beginning to enjoy lately. I am not a star of some sort, but sometimes, I just feel the need to spend more time with me and think about things, if you know what I mean... Nevertheless, I do not intend to bum around for a long time. This is just a "temporary madness". :)


...But for now, perhaps it's the next best thing. :)

Guess who's back...

She's back.

Somebody from my not-so-distant past is back in the Philippines. After six months of trying it out in the land down under, she has decided to pursue her studies and live life on her own.... in Ortigas. I was pretty shocked when I saw her. It was just a usual rehearsal day when BOOM! She's there. I didn't realize that it would be this soon before she sets foot on Philippine soil again. I have to admit, I was not ready to face her yet. Time hasn't fully healed me yet...

Don't get me wrong, she is not someone whom I have been involved with romantically (for I am not of that kind). She was just once one of my closest friends ever. We practically shared everything, even our home. Yet due to some misunderstandings and unavoidable circumstances (conflict in lifestyles, etc.), we just had to drift apart.

That was a hard stage in my life. Along with her, I felt like I lost all of my friends. I didn't want to make them choose between me and her. That would be very unfair for them. And since at this time she was leaving, I did not want to ruin her last moments with them too.

...That's when true friendship was tested. Among the big gang I used to have, only a handful of them remained to be my close friends, although all of them I am still civil with... the closeness isn't just there anymore. On the other hand, losing some friends gained me more friends.... Thanks to the Ad Congress, I have created super tight bonds with my housemates (that's another story... :D)

It was also a tough stage because I had to think of my friends and/or my family (our families got a bit involved with all this misunderstandings). I realized the importance of my family. It showed me that no matter what happens, my family should always be at the top of my list. Kahit na mawala pa sayo ang ibang bagay na importante sayo, basta pamilya, okay lang. Call me a martyr, but i just love my family very much, even if it meant losing some people in my life.

And now that she's back, I guess I just have to face the fact and try to be civil with her... That's the best I could do for now... until my wounds are totally healed.

Let MY Rat Race Begin!!!

Today, I officially start my jobhunting period.

My friend is coming over so we could help each other out with our resumes and cover letters. We are a bit clueless with what to write because back when we were taught to write cover letters, I dozed off to dreamland (I am still a very good student, sleep just haunts me occasionally). Now, the internet is my best friend, as I seek for various websites that can help me and my friend with our quest for the best jobs.

Jobhunting scares me. The thought of working in itself scares me. I can't believe that I am actually growing up... That I'm not a little girl anymore. Cliche as it may sound, but like Peter Pan, I want to be a child forever. Responsibilities scare me. The thought of paying for my own bills scares me. Heck, the thought of me going to my Makati office scares me.

But reality really does bite. I have to face my fear of growing up. I am not like Peter Pan... I'm a real girl. Like every human being in this world, I need to grow up myself.... well, it won't be bad if I leave a bit of my child-like self right? hehe.

Let my own rat race for THAT job begin.

Adventures of Pandora & Pumpkin

I was browsing through friendster when I suddenly remembered all those wacky moments with my soul sister. haha. :) Here are some:

1.) Getting caught by our teacher... playing MASH. Haha. This tops my list. It was during our Below-the-Line class, and we were having our usual meetings for the event we're organizing (Camp Creatives). The LCD Projector took so long to be set-up, so Nadine and I decided to play MASH. Of course, the names of guys we were in love with (and not) were listed down along with the number of babies we wanted to have and our maids-of honor, when all of a sudden... "Ano yang ginagawa niyo?!?!?!" HAHA. It was our teacher asking for that sheet of paper we've been fussing about. Of course, we hesitated at first, but we eventually surrendered. As he got the paper, his first reaction was, "Ano to, Flames? MAsh?... MASH nga... *laughs*" It was such a shame having the names of the guys written on the paper being said out loud. Lesson learned. As sir would say, "Ayan, kaya walang magmamash sa class ko ha!!!"

2.) Dao Ming Tsu!! Ultimate Secret Admirer... I used to have a little crush (oo, inaamin kong nagustuhan ko siya! haha!) on this guy who's 2 years younger than me and is the smartest in his batch, and we decided to play a little prank on him (for being a too proud at times). In line with Heart's month, his org had envelopes placed around school wherein you could submit poems and whatnots to be published on the valentine's issue of their paper. Being our silly selves, we thought of putting our "declaration of love" in one of the envelopes during our BTL class (crazy things do happen during this class! haha!) My friend placed her sister's cel phone number for him to text once he receives the letter. Unfortunately, he did text her sister.. but her mom was the one who replied. We were dead. He found out about us. haha. And my friend had to apologize of course. When she told her our side, my friend had to fabricate another story to make it sound better for him (he might get really hurt that it was a pure prank, so we added a little color to it). And right after that, everytime we saw the guy in school, we would just burst into laughter with people puzzled about the sudden laughs. Classic. :)

3.) It's Robbie!!!! We were catching the next show for Comedy of Errors, and from my place, we went to school. In the elevator, we were having our usual chats when we suddenly stopped at the 5th floor.... Low and behold, it's Robbie!! Robbie (as we love to call him) was this guy my friend met when we were having our "gembang" moment at Ponti. My friend told this guy her name was "Robbie", and we eventually found out he's from school too. My friend had no intention to know him, so she was slowly veering away from Robbie. hehe. From that day on, we would avoid hanging out at the Ledge because he's usually there. haha.... And now, of all the places, we would be caught in the same elevator with him! haha. Of course, I was the only one who noticed, so I looked pretty silly in the elevator, trying to hide my laughter. When we got down, my friend was even teasing me how I checked out Robbie, but NO!! I told her, "Gagee, yun yung guy na nagpakilala sayo sa Ponti!" HAHA. Next thing you know, we were just laughing until we reached school. :)

Gosh, I could go on forever with our adventures... haha.
Makes me miss my senior year :(

On Farewells, Goodbyes, and New Beginnings

I'm done for the year. :)

After four years of fun, work, laughter, and tears, I am finally through with my college life. It just seems like yesterday when I was choosing which school to go to for college. Now that it's finally done, I know that I have definitely learned a lot, not only things which regard school, but most of all, from the people who were around me through my four years of college.

There will be so much things I will miss about college life. I will definitely miss SDL, my family during the most crucial year of our lives... senior year. I would have to say that I learned so much from this bunch. They helped me grow into the person that I am now. Who would've thought that a group of crazy people with different personalities would get along so well and actually end up treating each other as family?? In this case, I would like to thank the people behind the "random" block delegations.. If not for you, we wouldn't be like this!!!! haha. I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Of course, there are still other significant people in my college life that I would like to thank....

UA&P CHORALE. I would remember the time when I would feel all kilig and excited everytime I go up to the third floor for rehearsals. A week without rehearsals just wasn't right. And who wouldn't forget Matabungkay?? haha. Because of you guys, I learned how to love the beach. I have never found people who had so much passion for music like the chorale. Although I may not have shown much dedication and passion for the past few months, deep down inside, I still live and breathe music.... with you around. :) Can't wait for our Taiwan trip :)

BLOCK O. I can't believe that after four years, we still keep in touch as if we have not been separated! It's so nice to know that I still have this bunch of friends with me despite everything that has happened. Thank you for keeping the flame going on and on. I hope this goes on til we find our own jobs. Thank you for making my college life fun. :)

VIARE GANG. "Everybody has a place in theater. Discover yours." With Viare, I discovered my other love, that is, theater :) THe euphoric feeling when you are on stage... damn, i miss that feeling! But there's more to it than being on the spotlight. Along with the productions, you get to meet lots of people as well. I will definitely miss the late nights with rehearsals and chit-chats in between. :)

"Tuloy, tuloy ang ikot ng mundo.
Hindi ito hihinto para lang sayo.
At kung ikaw ay maiwan,
Ako'y babalik at di ka pababayaan..."
- Ikot, Stonefree

This officially starts a new chapter in my life: my professional career.
Good luck to us. :)

Shattered Dreams and (Un)broken Hearts

Just when I thought I found my ideal guy....

He turned out to be 17 years older than me.

Yes. 17 years. When I was still playing my Barbies, he was heading already getting a COLLEGE diploma. When I entered my Hanson stage, he was already targeting to increase the market share of the brand he's handling. And now that I'm still graduating for college, he's a bigshot executive at some pharmaceutical company, all the while thinking that maybe he could be a very, very ideal prospect.

I met him during the Ad Congress last November, when I was urging to the place of the resident singer in the hotel lobby. After being rejected by the pianist (you could've seen my disappointed face), he approached me and asked me why I was sad. From then on, he became a friend.. well, more of an aquaintance actually.

The next day, we bumped into each other once again. He asked for my number and told me to keep in touch. All the while, I thought he was only 25, so I told myself, baka puede pa. And he was really nice to me, which gave him more pogi points. On the last day, we met up at Vudu, and I already felt that he was giving me the cold shoulder, indirectly telling me that I was too young for him... What better way to give back the "complement" by telling him he was too old for me too? hehe. From then on, I told myself to just forget him and include him in my 1st ever Ad Congress experience.

Months after, we were asked to a project which required us to interview marketing professionals. He was one of the few people that came to my mind. I told my friend to set an interview with him. I was too shy to do it myself. I found out that the whole time he had a different surname. The surname I thought was his' sounded the same. So much for my deafness.

And being the stalker that I am, I decided to search for him in friendster. It was a successful search, and I was very motivated (aba, application of learnings! :D) by it. For one, he had goals... And he was into outdoor sports, something I have never tried doing but have wanted to. He wanted a simple future.. but most importantly, my future is secured with him!!!!!!!!!!! +++++ prince charming points. hahaha. I gave myself the motivation to see him again.

... So the research went on. I had to find out his age. His age was another crucial factor. My friends and I would estimate his age, thinking he would be at the most, 28..... BUT NO!! After filling up the interview questions, I found out that he was 37.... No wonder he held such a high position at work!! All my hopes of ending up with him were shattered.......

I honestly do not have any problems with age gaps... but 17 years??? That's big an age gap! It's like marrying my 40 year-old uncle! HA HA!! Freaky.

Now I'm off to finding a new prince charming. :)

New Blog, New Beginning

I think my other blog exposes too much of myself.

Let this blog expose less of me. haha. :)

"... When being the third wheel isn't so bad after all"

Just reposting an old entry from my other blog... Love this! :)

May 18, 2005:

I have always been the consistent third wheel... I know, perhaps you would suggest that I find myself someone so that I won’t be a third wheel anymore, but sometimes, when I think about it, being a third wheel has its own perks too. But before going to that, what really is a third wheel? When do you become a third wheel?

....Well, based on experience, you become a third wheel when the following symptoms arise:
-when there's only three of you, of course.. or sometimes when you're five, seven, or nine (basta it's an odd number and you become the odd one out)
-when you're with couples, soon-to-be couples, or sometimes, even best friends whom you know have "something"
-when you feel like you've got no one to spend quality time with, or rather, you can't determine whom exactly among that big group of oddies (haha what a name) you can have "bonding" time with (in short, they all have their "bonding" buddies na)

But before going to the good side of it, let me just give a few reasons why it sucks to be the third wheel:
-...For the obvious reason that you're on your own and your friends have someone with them. It just doesn't feel that good when you know your friends are having a good time with your special someone while you're left there accompanying them and alone.
-It makes you contemplate on your being single. They reach a point where they forget about you and already separate you from their world despite being with them. And it makes you wonder if you should get a boyfriend too, which leads me to my last point...
-It pressures you to get a boyfriend too!!! haha. Despite not wanting to get one, you would want to have a boyfriend or a "date" so that you would have someone with you the next time you go out..
-(for extreme cases, although at present i'm not affected with this anymore) It hurts you, lalo na if the guy is someone you REALLY like. Need I say more??

So there. For years and years, I've been the ever loyal third wheel of my friends. I've accompanied friends to movies, mallings, and meals with their "potentials". It's not that I'm sourgraping about my being single and all (NO NO NO!!), but in fact, I'm here to celebrate the beauty of third wheel-ness. haha. Here are a few reasons why I enjoy being the third wheel:
-Sometimes, you become the center of attention (Well, for my case haha). I've enjoyed entertaining couples with my instant skits and dramathons and i'm just enjoying the job of making them laugh!! ehehehe
-Freebies galore!! Since i'll be with someone whom the guy likes, I get to share that gratitude he's showing to the girl through free food! haha. it has always happens to me that i get to have free movie tickets or free dinners when i become the third wheel.
-Bond with fellow third-wheelers! Usually, guys also bring their "friend" to "accompany" them. And usually, I end up forming good friendships with my fellow third-wheelers. And sometimes, it's an add-on if the guy's cute *wink* ... new potential!! bwahaha.

... So, being a third wheel isn't really that bad after all. I still enjoy being one, although sometimes, if it becomes too frequent, it gets into me... Hmmm.. i wonder if there's any song about being the third wheel... ehehe

Long live third wheelers! haha.=)