Quarter Life Crisis

Call me dramatic, but I am in pain right now. I feel so alone, so empty... so lonely. Like everything great happening in my life is just from the outside. Sometimes, I feel like I am pretending to be fine yet deep inside I am crushing. I don't understand why I am feeling this way, I should be really thankful for all the blessing I've had these past few months. Not everybody can say that they were given an opportunity to work abroad and experience independence at 25 years old... But why do I feel this way? Why do I still seek for true happiness? Why is there always a need for me to be with people or with somebody? Why can't I just live my life and do what I want without feeling down?

I am praying for strength to get over this stage. I've had a lot of drama in my life but I don't think I have gone through anything this bad. People may think that this is merely because of the recent "heartbreak" I had with this jerk/asshole I have gone out with these past few months.... Okay fine probably a big part of this is because of him and his devious ways, but it just sucks how that heartbreak could get along with my other personal issues.

I wake up not knowing what I want in life. I wake up feeling sad, empty, lonely... I really want to do something about it but I don't know where to start. I try hard-- I distract myself with work, jogging, movies, parties, clubbing, socializing.... But where is true happiness in all of this? How can I achieve this?

I know that I'll get over this soon. I know I will. I hope I can help myself get over this... I miss my family and my friends in Manila/Cebu so much. But I am still lucky to have a good set of friends in town. I don't know if I will survive all this drama without them. And thank God for Facebook & BBM. Helps me keep in touch.

I'll be okay, I will keep my positive thinking in mind... It's what I only have now. Faith in God and myself.